13. DISASSOCIATION WITH BLOOD RELATIONS
Man can neglect wealth and bear calamities with his patience and courage, but he cannot cut off his blood relations. The Companions of the Glorious Prophet of Islam (Sallallahu Alaihi Wassallam), after embracing Islam, disassociated themselves from their pagan relatives.
When Sayyiduna Sa’d bin Abi Waqqas embraced Islam, his mother took a vow not to talk to him unless he gives up Islam. She also stopped taking food and water. On the third day of her pledge she became so weak that she fell down on the ground and fainted. But Sayyiduna Sa’d was not moved with this and said to his mother in clear terms: “Had you had thousand lives in your body and lost those lives one by one, I would not have given up my faith.” 1
When Sayyiduna Khalid bin Sa’eed embraced Islam, his father rebuked him, beat him up, stopped his food and asked his other sons to boycott him. But Sayyiduna Khalid did not give up his association with the Prophet of Islam (Sallallhu Alaihi Wassallam) and at last migrated to Abyssinia. 2
During a battle, Abdullah bin Salol instigated Ansaar against Muhajireen. His son, Abdullah, said to the Beloved Habbeb (Sallallahu Alaihi Wassallam): “Allow me my master to kill my father.”
Utabah appeared in the battlefield of Badr with a naked sword in his hand and challenged the Muslims for combat. None other than his own son, Sayyiduna Abu Hudhaifah, separated himself from the Muslim ranks to face his apostate father. Utabah’s daughter wrote a poem criticising Hudhaifah’s initiative. She wrote: “You are not grateful to the father who nourished you since your childhood till you grew young. O Wretched and ill-fated Abu Hudhaifah, you are the worst lot in your faith.” 2 www.GardensOfSunnah.co.uk
During the same Battle, Sayyiduna Abdur Rahmaan (who was a pagan at that time) came out of the ranks of the pagan army and threw a challenge to Muslims. His own son, Sayyiduna Abu Bakr, came into the battlefield to face his apostate father.
After the Battle of Badr, Sayyiduna Rasoolullah (Sallallhu Alaihi Wassallam) sought the advice of Sayyiduna Abu Bakr and Sayyiduna Omar regarding the prisoners of war. Sayyiduna Omar said: “Ya Rasoolallah! Please ask Ali to behead his brother Aqeel and hand over a relative of mine to me so that I could behead him.” 3
3 Sahih Muslim, Kitaabul Jihad
The Jews of Banu Quraizah were the allies of Aws tribe and this alliance was treated more than blood relation among Arabs. The Glorious Prophet of Islam (Sallallahu Alaihi Wassallam) asked Sayyiduna Sa’d bin Mu’az, the Chief of Aws tribe to give his opinion as to what should be done to the warring Jews. Sayyiduna Sa’d did not bother about the alliance and gave his verdict: “The warring Jews be killed, and their women and children be taken as slaves, and their belongings be confiscated and distributed among the Muslims”. 4
After the Treaty of Hudaybiah, Allah commanded the Muslims: “Don’t marry an apostate woman”. The Companions of the Glorious Prophet of Islam (Sallallhu Alaihi Wassallam) were directed to leave their pagan wives who lived in Makkatul Mukarrama. 5 Sayyiduna Omar immediately divorced two of his wives who had not embraced Islam by that time. Many Muslim women migrated to Madinatul Munawwara leaving behind their husbands in Makkatul Mukarrama. None of these women got dejected in their faith. Sayyidah Ayesha says: “We don’t know any migrant woman who turned apostate after embracing Islam.” 6
The tribal integration was also the super-most power in Arabia, but the Companions of the Holy Prophet (Sallallhu Alaihi Wassallam) disassociated themselves from their tribes preferring service and 3 www.GardensOfSunnah.co.uk
dedication to Islam. Sayyiduna Sa’d bin Mu’az embraced Islam and cut off his relations from his tribe. He said to his people: “It is unlawful for me to talk to your men and women”. 7
8 Tafseer Ibne-Kathir, Vol. 7, p.159
But these events should not create an impression that Islam had turned its followers into hard stones and too cruel to associate themselves with their clan and relatives. On the contrary, Islam filled their hearts with lot of love and affection towards their kith and kin. That was why they felt bad when they saw their close relations, children and wives were following evil ways and thus exposing themselves to the divine torment. The Companions of the Beloved Habbeb (Sallallahu Alaihi Wassallam) often prayed to Allah: “O Lord! Grant us coolness in our eyes from our offspring and from our wives and make us the guardians of righteous people.”
This invocation indicates that they wished that their children and families may also be granted the wealth of Islamic faith and that they should also follow the Holy Prophet (Sallallhu Alaihi Wassallam)’s way. This would automatically give lot of satisfaction to the Companions of the Glorious Prophet of Islam (Sallallhu Alaihi Wassallam) as the head of their family. 8