Sayyida Khadijah
Mother of the believers Khadijah
(may Allah be pleased with her)
Khadijah’s (may Allah be pleased with her) family
Father: Khawalid
Grandfather: Asad
Mother: Fatima bint Zahida
Grandmother: Zayeda
Tribe: Quraish
Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) was born 15 years before the Prophet (may Allah bless him and grant him peace), in 556.[i]
Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) was first married to Abu Hala (Hind ibn al-Nabbash ibn Zurara of the Tamim tribe) she bore two children with him, Hind (son) and Hala (son). She then married Atiq ibn Abid of the Makhzum tribe, and bore a girl called Hind (daughter). Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) belong to the tribe of Quraysh.[ii]
Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) was the first wife of the Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace). She was very pious and seeing the piety and beauty of the Messenger of Allah she herself proposed to the Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace). Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) was very loved by the Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace). She was the one whom when people rejected the Messenger of Allah’s (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) message in the beginning excepted his call and embraced Islam, at the time when people were not helping the Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) at the time of need it was Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) who gave all her wealth to the Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) and it was Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) who gave birth to the children of the Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace). These include three sons Qasim, ‘Abdullah, Ibrahim (may Allah be pleased with them) and four daughters, Zaynab, Ruqayah, Umm Kulthoom and Fatima (may Allah be pleased with them all). The Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) did not marry anyone else whilst in the marriage of Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her).
She was the mother of all his children except a son, Ibrahim, who did not live long. As well as being a wife, Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) was also a friend to her husband, the sharer of his inclinations and ideals to a remarkable degree. Through every contumely and outrage heaped upon him by the idolaters, through every persecution, Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) was his dearest companion and helper. He loved her very deeply and did not marry any other woman during her lifetime. This marriage is the ideal of intimacy, friendship, mutual respect, support and consolation, for all marriages. Though faithful and loyal to all his wives, he never forgot Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) after her death and mentioned her virtues and merits extensively on many occasions. Providing their daily food and provisions, bearing their troubles and hardships, Muhammad (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) looked after his children and performed the duties of a mother as well as a father.
Imam Ahmad, Abu Dawud and Nasa’i narrate from ‘Abd-Allah bin ‘Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) that the most excellent of all women of Paradise are Khadijah[1], Fatima[2], Maryam[3] and Aasiya[4] (may Allah be pleased with them all).[iii]
Before he proclaimed Prophethood, he spent fifteen years with Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) sharing a quiet and tranquil life. He lived with her approximately eleven years after the Prophethood (Bi’tha), in a life of preaching (da’wah) and struggle against the disbelief (kufr) thoughts; in spite of this he did not consider marrying again. It was not known of him during his life with Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) or before his marriage to her that he was one of those tempted by the alluring charms of women.
He (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) married Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) while he was twenty-five years of age and Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) herself was 40 years old and she remained as a spouse for twenty-five years.[iv]
He did not contemplate, since the time he married Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) until her death, the prospect of marrying more than one wife and this was at a time when polygamy was a widespread practice amongst the Arabs.
Undoubtedly he would have at least considered another younger wife simultaneously with Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) if he ever suffered from lust and fondness of young women, particularly when the country’s customs wholly approved unlimited marriages.
After the death of Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) the Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) was sorrowful.
Seeing the state of the Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) was much worried and grief stricken by Khula bint Hakeem (may Allah be pleased with her). He had to look after his children and attend to the household chores, whilst remaining in considerable agnoy over the death of his loving wife. Khula bint Hakeem (may Allah be pleased with her) asked the Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) to marry Sawda (may Allah be pleased with her). The Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) agreed and Khula (may Allah be pleased with her) advised the father of Sawda (may Allah be pleased with her) and the marriage went ahead and became the ‘Mother of the believers’.’
She has narrated five traditions (hadith) from the Messenger of Allah (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) from which one is in the Sahih of Imam Bukhari.
She died in the tenth year of the Prophethood i.e. three years before the Hijra, 10th Ramadan and shortly before his visit to Taif in the year 620 A.D, at the age of fifty. She was 65 years old when she passed away in the blessed month of Ramadhan in Makkah. She was buried in the famous cemetery of Hajoon (Jannat-ul-Mu‘ala). The command of the funeral prayer did not exist at the time so she was buried without a funeral prayer.[v]
Lessons learnt
The marriage of the Prophet (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) and Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) teach the followers many lessons. Some of which include: Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) was a business and a wife too so one can leart how to balance their work, family and bringing up children by using Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) as an example.
She was widowed twice and was older than the Prophet (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) so a follower can bear all these in mind when looking for a partner.
Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) proposed to the Prophet (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) due to his honesty, this is very important for sisters who are looking to get married. You should not only look at the wealth but most importantly character.
[1] The wife of the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace.
[2] The daughter of the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace.
[3] The mother of Isa (Jesus) upon whom be peace.
[4] The wife of Firoun (Pharaoh).
[i] Azwaj-e-Mutaharaat, p.25
[ii] Encyclopaedia of Muhammad’s (may Allah bless him and grant him peace) Women Companions. P. 356
[iii] Zarqani, Vol. 3, Pg. 223-4
[iv] Zarqani; Vol: 3; Page: 227. Seerat-e-Mustafa; Page: 488. Madarijun Nabuwwah.
[v] Zarqani; Vol: 3, Page: 227